I recently attended a family wedding. Whilst this was a very exciting and joyous occasion, I couldn’t help but notice that the mother of the bride wasn’t enjoying it as much as expected because she was stressing out over minor details related to the organisation of the event. From an outsider’s perspective the event was well organised: the venue was great, the food and drinks were sorted, the photographer was doing her thing and everyone was there ready to celebrate. However, this particular family member was so stressed about small things like the placement of flowers in the chapel and shortbread at the reception that it really hindered her from enjoying the event that she had put so much effort into organising. In the grand scheme of the event, these small things were irrelevant, had no tangible bearing on the outcome of the day and no one would have noticed the difference if these details were missing. However, had she not ‘sweated the small stuff’, she would have enjoyed the day so much more, spending time with her family and celebrating the marriage of her daughter.
Start with the worst case scenario so you can avoid letting it happen
So let’s now look at another example. At The Social Adviser we recently did an exercise that our ‘Sultan of Software and Systems’, Adam, came up with. He wrote up on our whiteboard wall ‘How Not To Run AdviserEdge’. The whole idea of this activity was to get everyone to write up their thoughts on what we could do that would be detrimental to achieving our goals for the event and making AdviserEdge generally awesome. Far from being a pessimistic exercise, the purpose was to help us articulate what we wanted AdviserEdge to be by identifying the opposite. A lot of great points were made but the thing that stood out most for me most was that we all wanted this event to be fun, not taking ourselves too seriously and to make it enjoyable for not just the attendees, but ourselves as well.
This exercise was brilliant, because it’s easy to think about all the things we want AdviserEdge to be but then lose track of those things along the way. I think it was extremely beneficial for us all to share our thoughts and goals for the event by making sure we were on the same page regarding what we don’t want AdviserEdge to be. That way we can all hold each other accountable to ensure that AdviserEdge becomes the event that we all want it to be.
There is really only one way to make sure you won’t enjoy organising an event and that is to forget the reason why you are doing it. Whilst there are various reasons you may be holding an event, chances are that in many situations, fun would be close to the top of your list of priorities for the event. Focussing excessively on insignificant details at the expense of the main reason for holding the event in the first place defeats the purpose. And at the end of the day, who wants to go to an event where it is evident that the hosts aren’t enjoying their time?
What’s there is often far greater than what’s not there
But this doesn’t just apply to events. If you lose sight of why you are doing anything in life, it’s easy to focus on what is missing, rather than what you have created. When push comes to shove, we all have the choice to look backwards and see how far you’ve come, rather than the detrimental habit of looking too far forward at what we want things to be like, focussing on what’s not there rather than what is. Looking at what has been achieved, measured against our core goals from the outset, is a much more logical and fulfilling way of perceiving a situation or judging our ultimate success. Besides, there’s no such thing as perfection, only iteration.
To bring it back to the wedding example, sure the bride’s mother may have had a vision of how the day would look but when the day came, stressing about what was missing was only hurting her, and in turn, the experience of everyone else at the wedding. If her express goal was to be part of an enjoyable event and celebration, stepping back and looking at who was there, what was happening and how much everyone was enjoying their time could (and should) have put her at ease. The same lesson applies to anything that comes your way in life. Focus on what’s there, let go of what isn’t, keep the purpose in mind and make sure you are enjoying yourself regardless.
Keep the big picture in mind; define why you’re doing what you’re doing
Whether you’re organising a corporate event, a wedding, a pumpkin parade, a cheese-rolling festival, or even kickstarting a new initiative or project in your office, before you start the ‘doing’, get together with your team and focus on why you are doing it in the first place and what you want this event or initiative to become. What is your yardstick for success and enjoyment throughout?
Revisit your list frequently and make sure everyone is focussing on the most important aspects of your initiative that feed into why it is happening in the first place. Fun is contagious and people attached to what you are organising are more likely to experience this joy if the organisers are as well. Every step of the way, take a look at what you’ve achieved and created together, embrace it, smile, enjoy it, step forward, repeat.
Whether it’s an event you’re organising or any venture where you are bringing people together with a goal, I will use another cliché and say you only get out what you put in. So if you focus on what’s important, put in positive energy and enjoy everything you do, then that is exactly what you will get out at the other end.
HAPPY organising everyone!